Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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