Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.