just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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