Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
