Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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