she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
