mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize