too bad you live with your parents still
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
