it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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