i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
