No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
