im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I have feelings that need drinking.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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