If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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