what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
