Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize