forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
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Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
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There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
We are all done wearing pants today