He is an equal opportunity slut.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
