I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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