This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize