I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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