I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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