I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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