I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
