Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
