ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
