don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
