Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
