There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
