I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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