She said her name was "party"
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
