We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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