He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize