It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
