Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
