So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
dude. I can hear the air.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
