Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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