operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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