i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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