I hate all girls vehemently.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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