Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
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He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
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We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize