If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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