so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize