Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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