just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just found puke in my bra..
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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