We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
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we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
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if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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