You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
