i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
