Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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