When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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