Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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